Friendship

Friendship.  As women we crave it, but it isn't always easy to come by.  I recently heard someone say that they'd heard an older woman say We may get older, but we're all just teenagers inside.  I was struck by the truth of that simple statement.  We want to be liked.  We want to be accepted.  And we tend to hang out in our "cliques" because it's comfortable.  I don't think we do it to be mean (well, that may be different than high school), but it's easy to hang out with people we know.  Real friendship takes time, and most of us are so caught up in our busy schedules that we'd rather stick with what we know instead of taking the time to try to connect with someone new.  And honestly, many of us aren't even taking the time to regularly connect with the women we already know and love, so bringing in someone new can seem completely overwhelming.  True friendships require nurture and care, and they are so very important.

This year, I have had two dear friends move overseas as missionaries.  One of them in particular has walked beside me for about nine years.  We have been through pregnancies, marital struggles, miscarriages, babies, mission trips, and lots of laughter, tears, and late nights together.  When she moved, I felt like I didn't know where I belonged anymore.  Yes, I had other friends, but she was my "go to"--the one I could tell anything and could always count on to understand how I was feeling.  (And she's still that for me--it's just she lives on another continent, with a seven hour time difference, bad internet connections, and we can't be at each other's houses in 5 minutes time--it's more like 24 hours!)  When she left, I had a period of time where I felt kind of alone--and I didn't like it.  It wasn't because people weren't friendly or didn't invite me places, but it felt like something was missing.

In those first few months after she moved, I thought a lot about the value of friendship and saw first hand how much friendship matters.  I truly felt like a piece of me was missing (we do joke that we share a brain, so I guess part of me kind of is missing), and I was reminded how much women need that in their lives.  Yes, many of us are married and have a best friend in our husband, but women need other women.  We need to have someone who cries at commercials with us or who understands the mama pain our children can cause.

I'm always struck by David and Jonathan in the Bible.  Their friendship had such a depth to it.  I think that is the kind of friendship we all desire, and I think God desires for us to have those friendships in our life, too.  Every good and perfect gift is from above (James 1:17), and friendship is certainly a gift.  Though it can be hard, and though it takes time, it is worth it.

As I move forward, I hope to remember how these past few months of transition have been for me; I want to have my eyes open to those who may be lonely or needing a friend.  I don't want to be "too busy" so that I am no longer making new friends.  The Lord's plans didn't end for me once I hit my mid-30's.  He still has much to teach and show me, and part of that very well may involve people who I haven't yet called friend.

Who can you reach out to today who may be hurting or lonely?  Is there someone new in your neighborhood who would love it if someone just said hi?  Is there another mom at your child's school who always seems to be standing alone?  You never know where God might have a new friendship in store for you--and you never know how He might use you in someone's life.  Take a chance this week.  Ask the Lord to prompt you, and then respond in obedience to what He has to say.  You never know, you might just meet a "Jonathan" for your life.

Take a Moment

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."
--John 15:13

"We can do no great things, only small things with great love."
--Mother Teresa

I am a firm believer in the restorative powers of "a day of rest". I think if even God rested on the seventh day, we should all take a cue from His lead! Our world these days is so fast-paced, our calendars so jam-packed.. sometimes, as women, it can be enough to make our heads spin. We desperately NEED moments of rest.

There's almost nothing I love better than a long Sunday afternoon nap, when it's raining outside. Not all "resting" has to be napping, however. God created us for companionship, for friendship, for fellowship. After time with a friend, we usually find ourselves re-energized, refreshed and renewed! It's so easy to get caught up in work, taking care of children, responsibilities.. just "Life" in general, that sometimes we look up and realize we haven't seen or talked with our friends in far too long.

Grab a friend today, ladies.. whether you swing through Starbucks together, rent a chick flick and laugh until your sides ache, or just relax and have some yummy goodies together and catch up on each other's lives.

I thought I'd include a few easy, fun recipes for the cooler fall weather. Invite a friend over to share, drop by her house & surprise her with a treat, or (my favorite) invite her over and make a fun, easy recipe together. The time spent together, conversation and laughter will be priceless.

For many humorous girlfriend stories, more delicious recipes, and inspirational scriptures, check out a book, "Coffee Cup Friendship & Cheesecake Fun", by one of my favorite authors, Becky Freeman.

May you feel truly rested after spending time with one of God's greatest treasures: a good friend!

Mixed Fruit Cider
Ingredients:
1 quart apple cider
1 quart pineapple juice
3 cinnamon sticks
2 lemons, thinly sliced
1 orange, thinly sliced

In a Dutch oven, combine all ingredients. Bring to a boil over medium heat; reduce heat and simmer for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. Strain mixture, discarding solids. Serve warm.
Source: PaulaDeen.com

Baked Artichoke Dip
Ingredients:
1 14-oz. can artichoke hearts, drained & chopped
1 cup grated Parmesan cheese
3/4 cup mayonnaise
1 clove garlic, minced
1/4 tsp. Worcestershire sauce
1/8 tsp. Tabasco

Combine all ingredients, stirring well. Spoon into lightly greased 1-quart casserole. Bake, uncovered, at 350 degrees for 20 minutes or until bubbly.
Serve with melba toast rounds or your favorite crackers.
Source: The Ultimate Southern Living Cookbook

Pull-Apart Bacon Bread
Ingredients:
1 tsp. veg. oil
3/4 c. green pepper, chopped
3/4 c. onion, chopped
3 cans refrigerated buttermilk biscuits
1 lb. bacon, crisply cooked and crumbled
1/4 c. butter, melted
1 c. shredded Cheddar cheese

Heat oil in a skillet; saute peppers and onion until tender. Remove from heat, set aside. Slice biscuits into quarters; place in a mixing bowl. Add vegetables, bacon, butter and cheese; toss until mixed. Arrange biscuit mixture in a greased 10" tube or Bundt pan. Bake at 350 for 30 minutes. Invert onto serving platter. Serves 8.
Source: Gooseberry Patch's "Flavors of Fall"

Sopapilla Cheesecake
Ingredients:
2 cans crescent rolls
2 8-oz. packages cream cheese
1 1/2 cup sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 tsp. cinnamon
1 stick unsalted butter

Layer 1 can crescent rolls in a greased 9x13 pan; pinch together to cover the bottom. Cream together 1 cup sugar, 2 pkgs. cream cheese, and the vanilla. Spread mixture over crescent roll dough in pan. Top with 1 can crescent rolls; pinch together to cover top. Mix 1/2 cup sugar with the cinnamon and sprinkle over the top. Melt butter and drizzle over the top; spread gently to cover. Bake 30 minutes at 350.

Easy Chocolate Chip Cake
Ingredients:
1 box yellow cake mix
1 sm. box vanilla instant pudding mix
1 sm. box chocolate instant pudding mix
4 eggs
1/2 c. vegetable oil
1 1/2 c. water
1 c. semi-sweet chocolate chips
Powdered sugar (for top, if desired)

Mix together cake mix, pudding mixes, eggs, oil and water. Stir in chocolate chips by hand. Bake in greased Bundt pan for one hour at 350 degrees. Let cool slightly in pan, then invert onto rack and cool completely. Transfer to cake plate. Sprinkle a little powdered sugar over the top for presentation.

Garden Friends

The pastor of our church and his family were given a difficult burden to carry last year. Over the course of several months, many Sundays we were reminded how important the church family and other close friends were for them during their tough time. One phrase my pastor repeatedly used was "garden friends," which refers to Jesus' time in the Garden of Gethsemane when he took Peter, James, and John with him after having told the other disciples, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." (Matthew 26:36-37)

Though there were 11 disciples (friends) with Jesus at this time (Judas had already left to betray Him), He only asked 3 of them to go with Him in those final moments before His arrest. These were Jesus' closest friends.

As women I think we often long for these close friendships. We want to have someone to understand us; someone we can cry and laugh with; someone who we can call in the middle of the night when needed--not that any of our earthly relationships are perfect, but they are important. We long for Proverbs 17:17 to be true in our own lives: A friend loves at all times.

But some of us (myself definitely included) let ourselves get busy, and we don't nurture these God-given friendships. We let ourselves get caught up in our children, our husband/boyfriend, our work, our school, and we let our friendships slip away.

I had a friend call this week who I hadn't spoken to (other than via Facebook or e-mail) in probably a year. Listening to her sweet voice reminded me of what a precious prayer partner and friend she is to me, and it left me longing for more "stolen moments" to keep up with her. It reminded me how God had blessed me with that friendship and how I was missing out by letting it fade away.

In light of all of these thoughts, I have a birthday in a few days, and I have decided not to let it just pass by. I have invited some of my favorite people, definitely including some of my "garden friends," to go to dinner with me to celebrate--not to celebrate me, but to celebrate our friendship.

I am thankful for God's reminder to me this week: Friends are a gift from God, and I hope all of you are able to celebrate yours today.

*And if any of you are longing for those friendships, but don't know where to turn, here are some helpful links:
MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers)
Women's Bible studies (at FBC McKinney)
Early Angels