From The Inside Out

I had a routine physical on Monday.  We are in the process of adopting, and we are required to keep our paperwork up to date as the years go by while we wait.  One of the things we have to do is a yearly physical.  I've felt fine, and the doctor told me that everything looked great and I seemed healthy as can be.  That's how I like it--easy appointment and no problems.

I had blood work and a TB test done as well, and I went back in today to have the TB test spot checked.  All was again great as you couldn't even see where they'd done the prick.  The nurse then said, "All of your blood work came back normal...except for one."  What?  Except for one?!  I wasn't expecting this....She went on to say that my thyroid number was really low, which means I have a hyperactive thyroid.  Oh joy.  The doctor requested more blood work and an ultrasound of my thyroid.  I had the blood work done and then had the ultrasound done tonight, and I'll get the results back in the next couple days.

After finding out that I have a thyroid issue going on, I inquired about the symptoms, wondering if perhaps I'd been having some without even realizing it.  Sure enough, as I looked through the symptoms, I've experienced some of them recently.  However, each one in and of itself didn't seem abnormal and certainly hadn't been causing me concern.  Yes, I've been tired and wanting a caffeine drip even after a full night's sleep; yes, I've had more nervousness then normal, but I didn't know they were part of a bigger problem.

And as I thought about that today, I thought about how normal this is in the spiritual realm as well.  We have little problems, little sins, that are part of our lives, but we so often don't even notice them--or don't think they're problem enough to cause concern.  We live in this fallen world where "pretty good" seems to be enough.  Just like I feel pretty good, I can look at my spiritual life and assess it as pretty good....but that isn't where God wants us to be, or where we should desire to be!  Our "little sins" add up to a bigger problem.  As my thyroid problem could leave me with bone loss and osteoporosis if left alone, our disobedience and rebellion towards God can cause separation that leaves us wondering how we ever ended up so far away.  

Our bodies function best when everything is working properly, and we function best when we allow Christ to so fill us that we are living the life He desires--one where the "little sins" are no longer considered acceptable and barely noticeable to us but instead are things we desire to change and give to Him so that we might transform from the inside out.

I don't want to ignore the symptoms.  God is calling me, us, to obedience.  When I'm quick to anger and quick to speak, I am showing my "symptoms," symptoms of the Fall.  But what I want to show is Christ in me, so I cling to His Truth and ask for Him to fill me.  I don't want the World to see "pretty good"--I want them to see Jesus when they see me.